Conscious Leaders. What do you love?
If I asked you to name all the things you loved, how long would it take you to name yourself?
I’d say my dog, my family, trees, sushi, good wine, democracy, not necessarily in that order. For most of my life, I hadn’t thought to include myself on that list. Once I knew it was an option, I felt embarrassed, even full of myself, to add it to the list. Even as a Conscious Leader.
Putting yourself on the list and owning your ugly parts is a game-changer
But then I learned that the most happily successful people I know truly love themselves. Not in a “I’m better than you way.” but in a self-accepting way They do not criticize themselves, It’s a game-changer, one friend told me. When she fully accepted herself and welcomed even the ugly parts, she tapped into a deeper potential. One way it manifested was the courage to speak in front of hundreds of people.
Unconditionally accepting ourselves doesn’t mean we don’t see our blind spots or refuse to grow. On the contrary, in my conscious leadership coaching with women leaders and entrepreneurs, accepting self is a necessary step in the coaching process.
We can’t change what we won’t accept. It’s a simple formula: notice and accept, without criticism. Repeat.
This was highlighted when my husband Tim and I revisited our relationship commitments in a pandemic-inspired surge of even deeper reflection in our 30+ year marriage. We wrote our individual commitments and then shared with each other.
My big Aha!
My big Aha was that I wasn’t going any deeper in the couple hood until I was willing to go even deeper in self-acceptance and cut out the self-criticism that seemed to have worsened in quarantine. I dug out my copy of Learning to Love Yourself, by my friend Gay Hendricks. If you haven’t read (or reread) this slim but powerful book, take a few hours to revisit his lessons in self-love that opened him up to a life of abundance.
Do it Now!
Or, get on it in the next 10 minutes. Bring to mind something you do that brings even a whiff of self-loathing. Yes, that ugliness. Then, listen to this meditation from my teachers at the Conscious Leadership Group to move through the stages of accepting, and even appreciating, all of your many aspects of self.
And move LOVING MYSELF to the top of your Things I Love List. Then learn to be reveal yourself to others.